Uh…No: Prescription for ‘Less Traumatic’ World Relieves Kids from Pain of Becoming Resilient

All I can say is Thanks, Guys! Bravo!!!

People who cannot function in Condition Yellow will try to engineer a world in which they can stay in Condition White.

We are now going into the third year of a “world that is less traumatic.” How’s that working out for every body?

Bill, buck up and get some glasses like the rest of us middle-aged fogies 😀

The press has become an autoimmune disease? 🙂

This world … here in the US anyway, has become a place where we constantly see memes where we’re praising ourselves for getting out of bed in the morning or for not being OK, and, in fact, for giving no f***s and for saying that word a lot.

That last bit is a topic for another time, but I think it’s all related.

We raise our children to be resilient to adversity and fools (such as this doctor).

Regardless of the desires of the society’s Fauci worshipers, there is no “vaccine” for life’s tribulations. Like a strong immune system, one’s resilience in the face of trauma is often the difference between life and death.

Before I dive in and listen to our beloved gentlemen’s perspectives, I will loudly state that I wholly agree withthe “Uh … NO” title in the thumbnail. It is a response to an assertion made without wisdom.
According to whom shall the “less traumatic” standards be set? I am willing to bet that that do-gooder class has made no consideration for my five-year-old blind grandson. How is his world without visible light to be made better by such mindless assertions? Will he be better for them? I think not, because he is already nothing but a godsend to all who interact with him. He is usually happy to see all who know him, and rarely does one leave his presence without donning a smile. Sure, he would be able to navigate his world a littler easier without the need for a white cane; but at what cost? He does see just fine, albeit differently than most. In fact, I often find it difficult to escape him in a game of tag in an enclosed room — if I wish to continue breathing, it is nigh impossible to hide from him.
Dennis Prager recently released a short PragerU lecture about the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I do believe that if my grandson’s life was “less traumatic”, our family’s world would be further from heaven and a little closer to that hell aptly-described by Mr. Prager.
Before I dive in and listen to our beloved gentlemen’s perspectives, I will loudly state that I wholly agree withthe “Uh … NO” title in the thumbnail. It is an assertion made without wisdom.
According to whom shall the “less traumatic” standards be set? I am willing to bet that that do-gooder class has made no consideration for my five-year-old blind grandson. How is his world without visible light to be made better by such mindless assertions? Will he be better for them? I think not, because he is already nothing but a godsend to all who interact with him. He is usually happy to see all who know him, and rarely does one leave his presence without donning a smile. Sure, he would be able to navigate his world a littler easier without the need for a white cane; but at what cost? He does see just fine, albeit differently than most. In fact, I often find it difficult to escape him in a game of tag in an enclosed room — if I wish to continue breathing, it is nigh impossible to hide from him.
Dennis Prager recently released a short PragerU lecture about the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I do believe that if my grandson’s life was “less traumatic”, our family’s world would be further from heaven and a little closer to that hell aptly-described by Mr. Prager.

Good judgement comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgement.

Hopefully not all of your bad judgement. “Learn from the mistakes of others, kid. You won’t live long enough to make them all yourself” – said someone I forgot.

The “MD” obviously means, “mentally (or morally) deficient.” Using her “logic(??),” we can improve building safety by ending earthquakes rather than building quake-resistant buildings. The exaltation of fragility is typical Leftist sabotage. It’s the same mentality behind the foolishness that gun control & defunding police, or disarming our military, will make us safer from criminals and enemies. It takes MANY year of school to get THAT much STUPID pounded into your skull. When you hear anything this idiotic, always ask how many advanced degrees they have, and where they got them from. (Either that, or check their Party affiliation.) (This is another example of how screwed up politics ALWAYS derives from screwed up theology.)

A physical example is space flight. Astronauts have it EXTREMELY “easy” in space, but once they return to Earth, they generally have a difficult time and have to undergo much physical therapy to regain functionality.

An extreme in the other direction, I suppose, can be heard from Johnny Cash’s, “Boy Named Sue (Sioux?)” LOL
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cv05TdgIcQg

I have said this previously, but it bares repeating in the context of this episode.
The job of being a parent is not to raise happy, healthy children; it is to raise productive, well-adjusted adults who can be a functioning part of our society.
How can you tell the parents whose goal is the first and whose is the latter? Here is a short quiz. Determine if the following situation is an example of trauma or simply a learning experience/disappointment. (BTW – I have edited the sex of the person out of my examples as I determined that it doesn’t really matter.)
7 year old does not get selected to be on the competition level dance team.
7 year old’s father goes out to push a neighbor’s car out of the snow and has a heart attack and dies.
11 year old slips off a wall and breaks their wrist forcing the missing of the basketball season
11 year old’s mother dies of lung cancer.
5 year old has to wear older siblings hand me down which are out of style after 6 years
5 year old’s mother is in a bad accident resulting in a 3-week stay in Neuro Trauma ICU, followed by another 3 weeks in rehab. After mom comes home, needing full time care. 5 year old finally tells dad why she has been so upset. Dad, you told me mom was in I See You, but I was never allowed to see her. (the professionals told me it would be traumatic for my daughter to see her mom in that condition!)

Trauma is a very over-used word. There are traumatic events in ones life, generally fairly few in a normal life. If you consider the first event in each list to be traumatic, you will have no ability to over come the second event.
If you do not build up resiliency to traumatic events by learning how to handle disappointments, then you will not be a well-adjusted adult. You will end up as the type of person who, after getting fired (not necessarily traumatic), decides to get revenge on your boss and others who caused you to get fired.
Or run off the road the person who cut you off (not a trauma).
Well, you get the idea. Likely preaching to the choir here and now at the risk of writing an ACTS length post.

LOL @ your last sentence …

The fact is that we HAVE created a less traumatic world than our forebears knew. Infant mortality is down an order of magnitude from what it was in my grandfathers’ youth. Forced child labor, lethal and maiming childhood accidents, war, food shortages, and just about every other metric have dropped an order of magnitude too.

Up until the Leftists decided to take the side of criminals crime had been in a steady decline since the 1970’s.

The world is a much better place than it used to be. Sadly the result of this natural improvement in the general human condition largely due to the advancement of civilization and massively increased general wealth — Has bred a class of people who not only do not appreciate this improvement, they can’t even see it.

I’m starting to think that there are human beings that cannot function without some sort of “cause”, even if they have to invent one. These particular people cannot recognize reality when it bites them on the gluteus.

The really sad thing about such people is their “causes” are useless and often even destructive. They’re like my brother-in-law in that they are ALWAYS worried about the wrong things. If they spent that energy on something like world hunger, stamping out prions or voting for leadership that would do the things that prevent war instead of enabling it (looking at you, Biden and minions) they could actually make a positive difference in the world.

But no, they want to do stupid things like create a stress-free life for children so that children never learn the lessons of life and what should and should not be avoided.

Notice that this type of person never, ever does anything heroic, never becomes a genuine hero. They don’t have to, they are already heroes in their own mind for worrying about the wrong things. To them, everyone who doesn’t agree with them and fawn over their ideas is evil for opposing the “good” they advocate.

This is a relatively small minority but with the advent of internet communications it is growing at an alarming rate. Like a yeast culture if it is allowed to grow unchecked we will all drown in the wastes produced thereby. This is a far greater threat to humanity than “climate change” or any of the other causes this sort of person latches onto like a psychic remora. The comparatively larger portion of the population not affected with this disease demonstrates an alarming ability to ignore this problem until serious damage is done (again, looking at you, Joe Biden and minions for the damage you are doing).

I’m starting to think that if the human race is to survive and thrive we’re going to have to find a way to negate that sort of personality. It doesn’t look like we’re going to be able to educate people out of it, that attitude is pernicious and has invaded our educational institutions.

So what is to be done with this mass psychosis and those afflicted by it? Do we have to let them bring on a general collapse before we start putting such nonsense in the perspective it actually deserves?

That’s a question I can’t answer because I can’t think of any way to stop these people from feeding their own egos to our societal detriment.

I played outside a lot. I got dirty a lot. Every year I went to my grandparents farm and they put me to work. Gather eggs, slop hogs gather manure for the garden back home, literally threw bales of hay into the barn for later…..And still developed allergies. Cats, mold, ragweed and cigarette smoke. But not poison ivy.

Exposure to allergens normally help lessen allergic reactions. Indeed, that’s what allergy shots generally do. And I’ve gotten them all my life. I’m better with the shots. But I still react. And oddly, most of my bad ones I could not get shots for: cats and cigarette smoke.

Just making a point that exposure doesn’t always work.

But in general it does.

And by the way, I rarely get sick. My immune system is always in high gear it seems. It just sometimes attacks something harmless. But in the case of cigarette smoke, it over reacts, but it’s not harmless.

if you remember when my generation was young, a lot of television special programming was sponsored by the E.I. Dupont corporation and their slogan was “Better things for better living, through chemistry”. haha, we sowed the wind and now we reap the whirlwind. My wife has the allergies to chemicals such as formaldehyde and cigarette smoke and many perfumes which contain particles from plants and flowers like the poppy flower. The first time she ever had a major reaction was in church to a visiting lady’s new perfume which was (as we found out through some serious investigation) formulated using the poppy flower. It almost cost her her life on the first reaction and her life has never been the same. Formaldehyde is used to manufacture carpet, plywood and many drugs and anesthetics. It is hard to escape the effects of many of these chemicals that make up our daily lives and some people are affected where the vast majority of people never notice the presence of the offending scents. .

I always wonder when reading opinions like yours if you’re trying to say that somehow those “better living” improvements would be better left undiscovered and unapplied.

Your wife has my sympathies but she’s an outlier. For every single instance like your wife there are thousands, tens of thousands, or maybe even hundreds of thousands of people who benefit, often to the point their lives depend on, from those “better things for better living”.

Many of those who benefit would be in equal if not even greater distress as what your wife experiences. Many more than are experiencing that distress now. By a huge margin.

I’m not throwing your wife under the bus either. There are always people who as individuals suffer from some sort of malady or other and she’s the exception that proves the rule. I’m sorry she has problems and I do wish she did not. I wish everyone did not but that’s just not the way life works.

The net gain we’ve reaped from science and technology is of an order of magnitude that has thrust our modern world above many of those previous, lethal, horrible problems mankind has always lived with. Those advances sadly do not “save” everyone including your wife. I’m trying not to be callous here but as you say “the vast majority of people” never notice the things that cause her to experience problems. That’s because some of the things that cause her problems have been dealt with by “better living through chemistry”.

Personally, I’m not anxious to go back to the days prior to these discoveries. I can do just fine without a high rate of infant mortality, famine, crop failures resulting in economic ruin, plagues of locusts, smallpox and all the things that better living through chemistry has given us.

I do not count myself among those who would magically return to the world of 100 years ago, preceding “better things for better living”, if they could. I’m not a Luddite by any application of the concept and that distinguishes people like me from people who have a problem with genuine progress.

Still, it’s not a perfect world and I don’t say that it is.

I am not taking any offense at anything you have written. I only request that we all remain open to the idea that not everyone benefits from “all” progress. My wife nor I would ever want to go back to the world of 100 years ago and we both believe that we have lived in the greatest 75 year period in American and World history. Also, we have never advocated that everyone else submit to our standards to accommodate my wife’s condition. That being said, there are some exceptions. My wife had to spend some time in a rehab center following MAJOR surgery a few years ago and I spoke with the director of the facility before agreeing to commit to using his rehab center to see if he could assure me that none of the nurses caring for my wife would use perfumes or be cigarette smokers. He promised that he could guarantee that all the staff would comply so we signed up for the services of the resident facility. The room had a sign on the door declaring that no one wearing perfume or smelling like an ash tray could come in and all went well the first shift of the day. Second shift rolled around and on came a nurse who walked in the the room smelling like a trip through “Bed, Bath and Beyond”. My wife almost instantly went into anaphylactic shock and she was not supposed to even be on her feet due to the extensive spinal surgery. You cannot imagine what it is like to see the lady you love gasping for air and heaving to throw up at the same time she is supposed to be resting in bed. We both know full well that she is a rare anomaly when it comes to reactions to some things but the insensitivity and lack of honesty and caring for people like her is what gets to me. Especially when it comes to health care workers who should be more aware of the conditions of some patients. My wife may be rare but she sure as hell is not alone. Maybe now you can stop wondering about whether I am a “ludite”

I often flay the living crap out of people I think are idiots. Even here on this website, I pull no punches. Ever. You can be assured I’m not treating you like that because I’m not doing that to you. I don’t think you’re an idiot. I think you’re a person in a kind of pain unresolvable and un-asked for. Your pain is a byproduct of love and that’s admirable. So please take what I say in the spirit I actually say it in and not re-interpret my words as being offensive in intent. They’re not, you said you don’t take them that way but I’m prefacing what I have to say with this declaration even so.

Don’t assume that “I don’t know what it’s like”. I had to take some fairly serious medical training when I was in the service. Marines generally use Navy Hospital Corpsmen as medics but there are situations not conducive to that practice so some of us have to train for field emergency medicine and that is fairly comprehensive. I’ve seen lots of anaphylactic reactions and know exactly what they are and how to treat them to keep the victim wired together and alive until they can reach better medical care.

The proceedures in the field can be pretty gruesome. The airways swell shut almost instantly and an airway must be established by cutting the cricothyroid cartilage and allowing air to pass by that route or the victim will suffocate to death in minutes …

My sister has anaphylactic reactions to certain substances. Her medical history is no one’s business so I’m not going to be more specific but … I love my baby sister every bit as much as you love your wife but in a different way. I know what it’s like to see someone you love in the throes of a violent anaphylactic reaction and when I’m around her I always carry a knife every bit as sharp as any scalpel. That’s all I’m going to say on those lines.

I have to ask though, have you ever taken a blade to the throat of someone you love? Do you know what THAT is like?

I’ve seen a lot worse than that so gauge from there. I could throw “you don’t know what it’s like” back at you and be justified in doing so. Unless you’ve been where I’ve been and done what I’ve done. In which case you are a Brother to me and if or not, I’m assuming you are a Brother even so. We are at least nominally on the same side or you wouldn’t be here.

You have my compassionate sympathy regarding your wife’s condition. It’s all I have to give you or I would gladly give more.

I smell like an ashtray. I smoke cigars and pipes. My home smells like cigars, pipe smoke, leather and probably whisky. There are weapons all over the walls and stinky things spraying stinky chemicals to mitigate the smell of an old man living alone with his bad habits. Smoking cigars is not a heinous act that should be blankly scorned because it causes your wife distress.

It is not Dupont’s fault if your wife does not benefit from “better living through chemistry”. Millions of people have benefitted through that kind of thing. It’s not my fault if your wife has a violent reaction to the smell of cigar smoke. If I were aware of that, I would take the appropriate steps to protect her from a severe medical condition. I would go nowhere near her for starters. It’s not my fault or Dupont’s fault if some nurse did something she should not have done.

You have no grievance with any of us but the person who directly harmed your wife. A person who, by your account of events, should have known better and is certainly culpable.

You bringing Dupont into this is unfair and unreasonable. That was my point. I didn’t call you a luddite and you didn’t spell that word right. I said I’m not willing to undo the progress that Dupont and many other companies have given us and it’s unreasonable for you to target that kind of thing. You at least agree with the former if not the latter.

I’m sorry that your beloved wife has this sort of problem but it’s not a matter of blaming those who did not try to harm her. I hate to see anyone, or anything, suffer. I’m pretty cold blooded about that but suffering is always horrible. If I could wave a magic wand and help your wife I would do so.

What I won’t do is give you a pass for placing blame where it clearly does not belong. Innocence is a vital aspect. Blame does not belong on Dupont, it does not belong on perfume manufacturers, it does not belong on smokers of tobacco products.

I understand your distress and I sympathize and empathize. That said, I will not idly let you or anyone else publicly assign blame and heap scorn where it does not belong.

I’m not picking on you, I’m pointing out to you an injustice in placing blame where it does not belong. I understand your bitterness at the fate of someone you love, I do not condone you unjustly blaming people who “smell like ash trays” and who have provided “better living through chemistry” for your far from inconsequential travails. We did not do these things to your wife, we do not merit your scorn. If you insist on placing that scorn on us I will treat you like an idiot because that’s what you have shown yourself to be. Let’s don’t go there, I don’t think it’s needful to do so. I don’t think and I sincerely hope you’re not that kind of person.

I came here two years ago from the wild cesspools of social media on the internet. I don’t know how long you’ve been here but people here, generally, are more considerate and thoughtful than out in the wild. We’re on your side except for the few idiots that manage to maintain a subscription here. The point is and again I don’t know how long you’ve been here nor care, most of the better cut among us have had to learn how to swim in this much better, more intelligent and moral environment.

Including me. I came here full of piss and vinegar because the wild ‘net is a mean place and I had to learn by observation that this is a much better class of people. So I got my ass handed to me a few times before I settled down and treated people as the people they deserved to be treated.

Which I still do today. There are many people here worthy of my sincere respect and there are a couple of idiots. I give as good as I get but I’m asking you sincerely to not be one of the idiots and not to treat me like one of them either.

The last thing I have to say is that no matter what ills your wife suffers, you should be glad to have her and she you. I read your profile, you guys have been married for a long time and good for you. I really mean that and here’s why …

After my second divorce I came to the realization that I’m not good for the women I was married to. I have too many ghosts that are not their fault and too many bad habits including a lifetime of enforced secrecy to fully share a life with a woman. There are no women who really deserve that and if there were they’re not the type you’d want to be bound to.

I’m OK by myself. I am not a herd animal and I do not suffer from lack of human companionship. I prefer solitude and that’s another thing that makes it hard on a wife because being a wife, she does not prefer solitude or she would not get married in the first place.

So in a way, while I do not want to be like you and frankly I’m not suited for it, I do envy you. You’re living the tail end of your life the way God intended you to and I’m thankful and grateful that I have had the opportunity to stand between people like you and genuine evil. That standing in the way of stuff has done things to me and that, like Dupont and my cigars are not our fault, and are not your fault either.

I will try to make this as brief as possible. Sorry I misspelled a word. If you read my original post, I don’t think that you will find me “blaming” Dupont or smokers for any problems my wife has. I was simply trying to point out the fact that for the last 75 years, we in the modern world have made many advances and some of those advances have had side effects that we have had to learn how to deal with. My wife and I both know that she is playing the hand that she has been dealt in life and we have made many adjustments in order to preserve a quality of life for her and myself that we can enjoy. I became a member of this BWN almost 2 years ago though I knew of Bill and Scott for a few years before that. I also am very familiar with the life of secrecy that many have volunteered to live to protect the freedoms we all enjoy. I thank you for your service from the bottom of my sizable heart. I have worked for many years and still work for veterans rights and homeless vets and try to remind everyone I come in contact with on a daily basis that “someone” has laid their life down in their place. We must never forget the sacrifices made on our behalf by others. I’m done.. Bless you

I really feel sorry for those kids, being perfectly serious, i thought our job, as parents, was to teach them how to survive as adults. Unless we let the George Soros’ take over & make all of our decisions how will they learn? I bet every great invention in history involved a little trauma, horray 4 trauma,may they have a little and seek their creative, personal strength.

It is amazing to me how stupid some of these “learned” people can be! Her tweets are exactly the result of not using one’s brain, and writing with your emotions, in an effort of showing how much well intentioned you are than the next idiot.

“learned” people writing with their egos leading their emotions.”
Bill, Scott and Steve: I so look forward to hearing your thoughts and opinions. You are definitely the best at what you do!

Experts are generally a menace, I presume pediatricians are presumed expert.

In a wholly-different context, so do pedophiles have some expertise. I would not trust either with unrestricted access to my progeny.

I dunno. I thought that the Pop Tart looked like Florida. 8>)

I thought it looked like a partially-eaten pop tart. It was the attention-starved fools who claimed otherwise.

Well this is how we got the woke kids who are now technically adults who snap fingers for applause because they might trigger someone with clapping for the dude who just came out as a trans woman at an antifa rally while they basked in the glory of their victimhood.

Lady, we’re already in the world that results from trying to do this. We are developing into a society of stunted children.

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