It’s been more than a year since I took Jordan Peterson’s advice and sat on the edge of my bed and asked “What can I do to make things better instead of worse?” of myself. This video is the result. We can clear out the dead stuff from our lives and let it go. Forgiveness is letting go of things that are beyond our control.
p.s. I’m not sure how I should link the video.
5 replies on “Clearing Out The Dead Stuff”
“Forgiveness” is one of those terms that I find varies from person to person, to the point where I’ve never been sure of what exactly it means. So, I’ll describe how I handle wrongs done to me and the reader can decide what it is to them.
It’s quite simple, really. I refuse to carry the wrongs with me. I let go of them so that they don’t affect me in day to day life. What I don’t do, however, is forget them. Committing an injustice says something crucial about a person. I’m not going to deal with such a person as if the injustice was never committed. When I have to deal with that person, I proceed with justice – I remember who I’m dealing with and act accordingly. Then, when I’m no longer dealing with them, I move on again, not allowing their previous conduct to affect me.
Erasing the past is a mistake. It allows people to take advantage of you. You don’t “forgive” people the good things they’ve done, there’s not even a word for that. You shouldn’t live as if the past never happened. Just don’t allow it to affect you as life goes on. Use the knowledge to make your life better, in a way that makes rational sense. To me, that’s not carrying the past, good or bad, with me so that it’s a mass of dead weight holding me back.
Move on and don’t forget.
Thanks for your response, Michael.
I wouldn’t argue with that.
I was defining the term in the opening sentence of the video. Forgiveness is letting go of things that are beyond your control. Forgetting about them is nieve and acting as if the wrong was actually ok is denial. When I say defining the term, I mean that I am using the word in that way – not that I am telling you what you will find in a dictionary.
The Holocaust survivor I mention in the video (her video is linked in the description of the Practical Forgiveness video) was clearly not forgetting about the evils of the Nazis.
There is a common phrase among many Christians that we should forgive and forget. I don’t see an admonition by God in the Bible that we should forget. God may forget, we need not. If someone murders your loved one, forgiving them doesn’t mean they should go free. There is a reference to turning the other cheek, but, as far as I can see, that is a figure of speech indicating we are to show them a better person. A slap is not much of an injury.
When making the video, I purposefully did not include a Biblical perspective in an effort to reach the largest possible audience. Forgiveness isn’t exactly a hot topic to begin with.
~David
Dear David,
This is exactly the medicine I needed this morning. Thank you and bless you.
-Elizabeth
You are welcome. Thanks for mentioning.
Akira the Don – Deadwood feat. Jordan B Peterson (JBPwave) – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DeTmMPtdtX0