How Joe Won the Election (maybe)

Disclaimer: When certain newsworthy facts come to light, for example the sketchy Hunter Biden scandal, and the news media does not dig in to discover the true story behind those facts, even going so far as to suppress the story with censorship, it leaves it to the fertile mind to fill in the blanks. Next thing you know, you have a conspiracy theory. That’s what this is.
Before getting started, let’s ask: ‘Who on earth in their right mind would pay billions of dollars for a meeting with Joe Biden back when he was a political nobody?’
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Here’s what happened:
On one of his journeys to the Middle Kingdom, Joe Biden received a proposition, over a cup of tea, from his pal, Xi Jinping. “I’ll give you a couple billion US dollars and all you have to do for me is run for President of your country.” Seeing he had Biden’s attention, Xi went on, “We’ll do what we can to get you elected. As you know, we have vast resources in the United States.” Biden nodded. “And, of course, if we are successful, you’re in my pocket. Sound good?”  The greasy slimeball that he is, and has always been, Joe saw no problem with it. Easy money. “Sure,” he said; which is “Yes” in Mandarin. “I always did want to be President. You know I ran a couple of times, back in the day.”
“Yes, I know,” said Jinping. “You got smeared. I think you’ll have better luck this time. ‘Three’ is the charm”
Biden sipped tea thoughtfully. He wanted to pick his nose but decided this wasn’t the time.
“And what about the money?” he wondered. “I mean, don’t you think it might look kind’a suspicious?”
“Not to worry.” the dictator assured him. “We’ll do it Chinese style. We give the money to your trusted relatives and you work it out with them.” Biden smiled. Ping continued. “And we will funnel the money through one of our oil companies; as well as some other money-laundering tricks we have up our silken sleeves. When it comes to money and laundry, we know what we’re doing,” he boasted. “It will all be on the up-n-up. No one will suspect a thing “
“Man!” Joe was blown away by the emperor’s acumen. “You Chinamen are clever little bastards, aren’t you? Let’s do it.”

He mumbled and fumbled his way through the primaries. While at the beginning it looked like he would be the first to be eliminated from the pack, somehow he landed on top of the heap. Meanwhile, ANTIFA and BLM reeked havoc in the city streets–breaking windows, burning building, looting. Police were ordered to stand down and just stand there to be pelted by bricks, maced and blinded by pocket lasers. The Chinese Coronavirus had brought the nation to its knees. The economy a mess. Every bit of it was Trump’s fault, according to Brian Williams and the rest of those propagandist sellouts. The New York Post article about Hunter’s “laptop from hell” came out and was instantly suppressed; hinting that there was a massive conspiracy afoot; and that the Internet giants were in on it. Biden was soaring high in the fake polls and finally, November third–the only poll that matters–arrived.

ANTIFA, by then, and those other Marxist gangs had settled down and all but vanished from the hoods. The word went out that they were gearing up for a massive assault on election day and everyone boarded up their cities in preparation. Though, that was just a decoy…a ruse. Those Commie anarchists–who were financed by the Democratic Socialist Party and various other Marxist organizations in the U.S.; who were, in turn, financed by the CCP–had other plans. They would be doing the heavy lifting in this coup. There was counterfeit ballots to be printed. A lot of them needed to be filled in with pens by hand. Then the counterfeit ballots had to be transported to polls for counting. ANTIFA/BLM (whose faces are usually covered with black shrouds) would pose as observers and counters and had been trained in all manner of cheating to give Biden the edge. A big job. The operation was well coordinated across several key states. Plus, someone had to muscle away the Republican observers if needed. The counting went on into the night.

At some point, lets say about midnight, they realized they were in above their heads. The Trump votes were so overwhelming, in all battleground states, that there was no way to show that he was loosing to Biden. Even the mail-ins were Trump. They simply weren’t prepared for this. Trump was way ahead. Panic kicked in. They needed more fake ballots. Millions of them. Everywhere. That’s when the counting stopped, in mid-stream, simultaneously across the battleground states. Republican observers were kicked out of the counting rooms. Cardboard went up on the windows. Everyone was sent home. Calls were made. Printers started humming. ANTIFA hoodlums sped through city streets in courier vans marked with “Biden-Harris” on the sides. Warm ballots were being carelessly filled in: Biden, Biden, Biden- Biden….an endless job. No need to fill out the other races. Just Biden, Biden, Biden…. [Look for those ballots–supposedly mail-ins–all marked with the same pen.]

Yeah. This was no election. It was a full-blown coup d’etat. An overthrow of the U.S. government by China and other foreign powers–all enemies.

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Postscript: This fantasy was first drafted and emailed to a friend on November 13/2020. Since, we see that the Trump legal team, led by Rudy Guliani, have unearthed and continue to unearth evidence pointing to international conspiracy behind this election; including alleged Chinese money involved. Sidney Powell is being particularly persecuted and ridiculed by the media and Democrats for her claims of international foul play. Which should alert us that she is on to something: The Truth.